After several months, finally, I have to admit that I couldn't free myself from this job anyway, since the only source of living that I'm capable of doing is only clothes designing, although to be honest I didn't enjoy it as much as drawing. I just have to deal with the fact that I couldn't earn so much from drawing no matter how much I love it.
So, in the end I'm back on the path that I was about to leave before, which is clothes and graphic designing. However, I still refuse to give up on my other 2 dreams beside this one, drawing and teaching for fun. If only I can see the bright light from both paths, I will be happier. Well, no time for whining but just get my lazy ass off the chair and do something useful.
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